singing the body electric & tripping the light fantastic.

"Nice place you got here."

"Thanks. We just painted."

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tags
Stargate SG-1 - Stargate Atlantis

season eight - season nine
1oxo3: The Pegasus Project
1oxo5: Uninvited
1oxo6: 200
1oxo8: Memento Mori
1ox13: The Road Not Taken

4xo4: Doppelganger
season 4 spoilers - season 5 spoilers> - Sci-Fi Friday

Agent Barrett - Adria - The Odyssey
when stargate boyfriends go bad - dead Carter boyfriends

The Ark of Truth - Continuum

Ages ago at Comic-Con, they premiered V, which I somehow ended up catching twice. Anyway, I wrote this, and set it aside until the show premiered, and only got around to posting it now. As such, it's probably rendered AU by whatever's aired since, which I have not yet seen. (I also appreciate that Elizabeth Mitchell is first-billed, and not due to alphabetizing the cast. How often do you see that happen?)

Title: Paranoia, Paranoia, Everybody's Comin' to Get Me
Fandom: V
Characters: Erica, Erica/Dale
Word Count: 1059
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: 1x01, 'Pilot'
Challenge: N/A
Warnings: Slight sexual content.
Disclaimer: No one mentioned belongs to me.
Summary: Erica woke in a cold sweat, taking deep breaths and praying she could force down the bile.

( Paranoia, Paranoia, Everybody's Comin' to Get Me )

And because I hadn't posted it yet, though I was there at the conception (an awkward statement if these were pictures of friends' babies). Uncut, because really, there be no spoilers here:

Courtesy of doven, who is a genius. And courtesy of RTD, who may or may not have fallen asleep halfway through writing the script and suddenly realized it was due in eight hours, so he slammed a handful of Red Bulls, cranked up the metal, and hoped for the best. (How did you get through college?)

Just a quickie episode tag.

Title: Family Man
Fandom: The Office
Characters: Jim/Pam
Word Count: 616
Rating: G
Spoilers: 6x10, 'Murder'
Challenge: N/A
Warnings: N/A
Disclaimer: No one mentioned belongs to me.
Summary: Jim doesn't know if he's doing the right thing.

( Family Man )

Helen: "It's just that sometimes you judge people's behavior by a pretty rigid set of standards. Not everyone can live up to them."
Daria: "That's what's wrong with the world."
Helen: "Not even you live up to them all the time."

This has probably been sitting in my WIP folder for forever and a day, which is odd, given that it's from the fifth season, and for some reason I'd convinced myself this episode happened in the fourth season. But I guess it didn't, did it?

Title: Had You Come Some Other Day
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Characters: Ronon, Keller
Word Count: 1600
Rating: PG
Spoilers: 5x06, 'The Shrine'
Challenge: N/A
Warnings: N/A
Disclaimer: No one mentioned belongs to me.
Summary: Ronon visits Jennifer to pass along an important message.

( Had You Come Some Other Day )

So last week on The Office (again, I acknowledge that 5 out of 10 posts, if not more, start with the word "so", and I'm working on a fic where that is the opening word), Michael had Dwight do that "concentrate" game where you pretend like you're cracking an egg on someone's head, etc. And I've been browsing los del internets trying to find the lyrics and such, although the ones they have are not the ones I remember, even though I can't remember them. (I recall that rose_garden and I used to do these, and she had her own version, something about apples.) But naturally, searches like these lead to other rhyming/clapping/whatever games, such as:

Down down baby, down by the roller coaster
Sweet sweet baby, I'll never let you go
Shimmy shimmy coco pop
Shimmy shimmy pop
Shimmy shimmy coco pop
Shimmy shimmy pop
Grandma, grandma, sick in bed
I called the doctor and the doctor said
Let's get the rhythm of the head: ding dong
Let's get the rhythm of the head: ding dong
Let's get the rhythm of the hands: (clap clap)
Let's get the rhythm of the hands: (clap clap)
Let's get the rhythm of the feet: (stomp stomp)
Let's get the rhythm of the feet: (stomp stomp)
Let's get the rhythm of the hot dog
Let's get the rhythm of the hot dog
Put it all together and what do you get
Ding dong (clap clap) (stomp stomp) hot dog
Put it all backward and what do you get
Hot dog, (Stomp, stomp), (clap, clap), ding dong.

Which, you know, I totally remember doing as a kid. At my elementary school, we had to stand outside under an overhang and wait for the bell to ring, so this is how we passed the time. I remember "hot dog" as being an elaborate circle of the hips. A precursor to the Macarena, if you will.

And of course the version of Miss Susie that we did was as such:
Miss Susie had a steamboat, the steamboat had a bell, Miss Susie went to Heaven, the steamboat went to-- hello operator, give me number nine, and if you disconnect me, I'll chop off your-- behind the 'frigerator, there was a piece of glass, Miss Susie sat upon it, and broke her little-- ask me no more questions, tell me no more lies, the boys are in the bathroom, zipping up their-- flies are in the city, the bees are in the park, Miss Susie and her boyfriend, are kissing in the D-A-R-K, D-A-R-K, D-A-R-K, dark dark dark! Darker than the ocean, darker than the sea, Miss Susie and her boyfriend are kissing in a tree!

(Which could be me misremembering, but I know there are apparently lots of versions of this, and really, how dark is this tree?)

And I don't for the life of me remember what it was from, but the line: "Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider," which makes me laugh even now, although for entirely different reasons.

(Regionally, I grew up in upstate New York, near Pennsylvania, so if you recall different versions, I'd be interested in knowing where you were when you heard them that way.)

Congratulations, by virtue of reading this post, you are now reduced to a grade school mentality. (PR friends, you were already there.)

This was originally a prompt in the most recent round of the Porn Battle. I didn't want to make it porny, so I saved it for later.

Title: To Be A Royal
Fandom: Beauty and the Beast/The Little Mermaid
Characters: Ariel, Belle
Word Count: 1483
Rating: PG
Spoilers: The films.
Challenge: Disney Princesses, Ariel/Belle, grand tour, ballroom
Warnings: N/A
Disclaimer: No one mentioned belongs to me.
Summary: When Belle meets Ariel, she suddenly feels a lot less like a princess herself.

( To Be A Royal )

My canon on this is probably way off, as far as timeline goes. Moreover, it gets its ideas from the R arc of the manga.

Title: infidelitas
Fandom: Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon
Characters: Setsuna/Endymion
Word Count: 716
Rating: PG
Spoilers: N/A
Challenge: N/A
Warnings: N/A
Disclaimer: No one mentioned belongs to me.
Summary: Setsuna can see through time, and knowing the future makes the present much worse.

( infidelitas )

This is based on a scene from the montage in the series finale. It was something I always suspected was going on, and it may or may not have been confirmed by Rob Cooper in the commentary. Unless I imagined that. (The Teal'c/Sam relationship was actually confirmed by Amanda Tapping. I did not hallucinate that.)

Title: Save My Life, I'm Going Down for the Last Time
Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Characters: Daniel/Vala, ensemble
Word Count: 3679
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: 10x20, 'Unending'
Challenge: N/A
Warnings: Dark, unhappy themes.
Disclaimer: No one mentioned belongs to me.
Summary: As a general rule, Vala tried to stay away from delivering bad news. And while she thought Daniel would be slightly more receptive than the usual minor Goa'uld or crime bosses she'd served, Vala wasn't exactly eager to share this particular bit of news.

( Save My Life, I'm Going Down for the Last Time )

Title: The Femme Fatale Grand Illusion
Fandom: The Middleman
Characters: Noser/Lacey, Middleman/Lacey
Word Count: 2392
Rating: PG
Spoilers: 1x07, 'The Cursed Tuba Contingency'
Challenge: N/A
Warnings: N/A
Disclaimer: No one mentioned belongs to me.
Summary: Lobster isn't the only thing worth leaving the house for.

( The Femme Fatale Grand Illusion )

Title: Comfort Food
Fandom: Power Rangers RPM
Characters: Dillon/Summer, Scott/Summer
Word Count: 1494
Rating: G
Spoilers: N/A
Challenge: obsessivemuch prompted me with 'RPM, Scott/Summer/Dillon, in the kitchen', and this was the best I could manage.
Warnings: N/A
Disclaimer: No one mentioned belongs to me.
Summary: This decision actually should have been quite easy, Summer thought with consternation.

( Comfort Food )

( PRRPM, episode 28: Run Ziggy Run )

( PRRPM, episode 27: Control-Alt-Delete )

( PRRPM, episode 26: Beyond A Doubt )

( PRRPM, episode 25: Key to the Past )

I'm watching this episode of Psych, and do you know who the priest is? Ray Wise. AKA, the Devil from Reaper. Poor Ray Wise, his Devil is so awesome I will officially never see him as anything but. I hope it turns out he's secretly evil or something. Well, not hope. I expect it. Poor Ray Wise.

Friends, Romans, countrymen, program your Tivos! Look for me TODAY on Tyra (The Tyra Banks Show), 4 PM EST, on your local CW channel. I'll be there in between Serena Williams, Michael Strahan (whose new show is the lead-in to Dollhouse, of all things), and Nelly Furtado. Yeah, I don't get it, either. Anyway. I'M ON YOUR TELEVISIONS. World domination: STEPS AWAY.

To aid your search (hey, my mom's watching this!): I'm in the back row, three from the left of the staircase.

ETA: I can see my shoulder!

ETA2: This girl asking the question came in in a sexier green dress. They took her backstage and made her change.

ETA3: OMGGGGG THERE I AM. WHAT'S UP NOW.

Okay, yeah, I know this video is old news. It's been saved in my RSS feed since forever, since I used to read it at work, but couldn't watch videos... but, you know, that's beside the point. It kind of flows as the most awesome fanfic ever, only better. Edward Cullen is a stalker.



IF YOU LIKED THIS, YOU MIGHT ALSO ENJOY: Hogwarts is a Terrible School. The two are completely unrelated (unless you take into account the Robert Pattinson connection, obv.), but I had a good night's sleep, for fucking once, and am caffeinated on top of it. In sum: you don't learn anything at Hogwarts except for magic. You don't even get sex education. That's not in the essay, but I'm thinking about it now. I mean, do they even have preventative measures in the wizarding world? Birth control spells? Or do they have to head on down to Diagon Alley for some cauldrons with a side of condoms? I bet wizards have weird STDs. All that exposure to magic-radiating shit has got to do weird things to your immune system. And what about allergens? Obviously they have the normal familiars, but you can pop an Allegra (ahhhh) and chill with Crookshanks for awhile. What do you do if you're allergic to horses? (I'm sure there are people who are allergic to horses.) That eliminates your ability to remain in contact with hippogriffs, centaurs, thestrals... a whole big mess o' shit. Care of Magical Creatures is a required class, and your ass will flunk out. And imagine all the hallucinogenic pollen flying around in Herbology. I'd be flat on my ass in under a minute. I mean, are there drugs? They don't even have a cure for spattergroit. I'm just saying.